Should Women Smile More?
"Women should smile. Men feel entitled to tell them to."
'Smile more' is the most common unsolicited comment women receive from strangers in public. It's a social command disguised as a friendly observation, and research on emotional display rules shows women are expected to express positive affect at rates men are not. Women who don't smile get penalized; women who smile 'too much' get taken less seriously. Both are the problem.
What the data says
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Across 405 observational studies, women smile more than men in nearly every context (d ≈ 0.40). The gap is largest when women know they're being watched, smallest when they think they're alone — evidence of display norms, not emotional state.
LaFrance, Hecht & Paluck, Psychological Bulletin (2003) · 2003 · Meta-analysis of 405 studies
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In a workplace experiment, women rated as 'non-smiling' in neutral photographs received 18% lower hirability ratings than men with identical neutral expressions.
Wieckowski et al., Journal of Nonverbal Behavior (2020) · 2020 · Experimental photo rating study
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Women who smile during a salary negotiation are rated as less competent; men who smile are rated as more competent and likable. Same gesture, opposite interpretation.
Gündemir et al., Journal of Applied Psychology (2019) · 2019 · Experimental negotiation study
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Pew 2023: 35% of women report receiving unsolicited 'smile' comments from strangers; just 6% of men. Women under 35 report it most frequently.
Pew Research on gender and public space (2023) · 2023 · National survey
Where it came from
The 'smile more' demand sits inside a larger cultural expectation of female emotional labor — what Arlie Hochschild's 1983 *The Managed Heart* called 'emotion work.' Flight attendants, receptionists, retail workers are explicitly trained to smile; women in public are informally expected to. The explicitness in service jobs was the template; the informal version crossed over.
What this means
Women face a smile double-bind. Don't smile: 'cold,' 'aggressive,' 'unapproachable,' lower hirability ratings. Smile too much: 'not serious,' 'incompetent,' lower authority ratings. Men face neither. The phrase 'smile more' is a specific instance of a more general pattern — women's faces are subject to social regulation that men's are not.
Frequently asked
Do women actually smile more than men?
Yes, on average. LaFrance et al.'s meta-analysis of 405 studies found a moderate effect (d ≈ 0.40). The gap is largest when women know they're observed — consistent with display-rule effects, not a biological baseline difference.
Is there a real penalty for not smiling?
Yes, experimental data show hirability ratings 18% lower for women with neutral expressions vs men with identical neutral expressions. The penalty doesn't apply to men.
What about the opposite — smiling too much?
Also a penalty. Gündemir et al. 2019 found women who smiled during negotiation rated as less competent. Men smiling were rated more competent and likable. Same gesture, opposite interpretation.
Is 'resting bitch face' a real phenomenon?
The face itself is just a neutral expression. The label is the phenomenon — it only gets applied to women. The same expression on men is typically described as 'serious' or 'thoughtful.'
How common is the 'smile more' comment from strangers?
Very. Pew 2023: 35% of women report getting it; just 6% of men. It's concentrated in women under 35. It's one of the most-reported forms of gendered street commentary.